All who hate me whisper together against me; Against me they devise my hurt. “An evil disease,” [they say], “clings to him. And [now] that he lies down, he will rise up no more.” Even my own familiar friend in whom I trusted, Who ate my bread, Has lifted up [his] heel against me. But You, O LORD, be merciful to me, and raise me up, That I may repay them.
We may place rejection outwardly towards others at times. For some, it can be used as a way to willfully manipulate another person and for others it can manifest as a disgusted look or an outburst of anger, a lack of appreciation or even a societal snub. This shows disrespect and that someone else has a lower value than should be placed upon them in our eyes. This can be done to the degree that the person of our target shapes their behavior to meet their unmet need of acceptance. So in this way rejection can be used to shape the behavior, wrongfully, of another.
Q. How have you used disapproval towards others to get your own way?
A. Sadly, I fear that I’ve used it to manipulate my daughter Audrey when she is not doing what I would like her to do. She may want to play a particular game like Play-Doh and because I don’t want to pick up a mess, I’ll shift her attention to something else like coloring which I enjoy more and is less difficult to clean up afterwards. This can show disrespect to her choice and I may regret doing this sometimes. Occasionally a shift of attention for a child is an effective way of training them and I believe it should only be used in that context, if possible.
Lord help me to see when I’ve used this power of manipulation over another so that I can repent and change my ways. It is selfish to act in such a way to expect personal fulfillment in this regard when I should merely be content with who I am and who you’ve made me to be.2013-08-01
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